Epilogue (R&M 3)

I look around her room. Strangely empty. Rearranged to mirror earlier, more stable times. My mom is no longer here. But of course she is here. In memories. In objects. Her smile is embedded in my mind. Her enjoyment of life; her spirit. Her strength, which far exceeded anything imaginable. I said my peace to her. A not so young man of few emotionally-laden words. We had an understanding. A connection. Not so much mother son. But more because we were cut from the same mold. I was the younger, male version of my mom. And as a result we connected. She knew my thoughts without them being spoken. But still I spoke. Words that in life remained unspoken. I believe strongly in actions over words. But there are times when words are all that matters. This was one of those times. And in her last days, with no food or water, she managed a brief tear; I of course had quite a few more. I knew I'd been heard.

In the end, when she couldn't talk or blink or move, she heard. Heard my words and understood them. I asked her to go in peace. To not be afraid. To know that she was the best mom. To know that she raised a great family. To know that she was loved. To know that I loved her. To know that I think about her everyday. She was special. I carry her with me always. And I think that, wherever she is, she sees me and walks with me. Yes, walks with me. Quietly, in the shadows. But very much there. I hope that I will rejoin her one day long in the future. And that we can talk about things. And sit down with some coffee - hers sickly sweet and mine black and bitter. About the only difference between us. And I could hear her laugh and see her smile again.
But until I rejoin her I hope that I can honor her. And that I can make her proud. Everyday. Her regard of my life was more important than most anything.

Folks, allow me a moment. Whatever your problems, fix them. Whatever your gripes, get over them. Whatever your conflicts, resolve them. Don't waste time on drama. Be someone who solves problems instead of creates them. Life is a treasure and it should be regarded fondly each day.

Do not waste the greatness before you.